Everyone probably remembers the scene in American Pie where Jim has his first intimate experience with a girl, Nadia, and it all goes horribly wrong. Twice. Though this is highly exaggerated, and doesn’t happen to everyone, some men do have a problem with premature ejaculation. And although it may be fine while masturbating, getting an orgasm too soon, can make the experience less satisfying when a partner is involved. So let’s start with potential causes of premature ejaculation: lack of experience/practice; when you just start to have sex, the amount of stimuli you receive both mentally and physically can simply overload your system. With more practice, you get desensitised a little bit and will be able to last longer. Hormones also play a part in this: that is why, when you’re a teenager, you are more prone to prematurely ejaculating.

Countermeasures - Together:

During sex with your partner, make sure you are relaxed. The experience should be a pleasurable way of exploring yourself and each other.

Whatever you’re doing; start off slow. You don’t want to get too excited too soon.

With every single relationship; even purely sexual ones- communication is key! You have to be very clear with your partner about what you like and dislike. If your partner touches you in a way that is too sensitive, express it! Make sure not to criticise, but explain the problem. There is no need to feel ashamed! It’s my opinion if you are comfortable enough to get down and dirty, you should be comfortable talking about it as well!

Make it a point to explore your partner, and touch your partner all over, not just their private parts.

After penetrating your partner, again go slowly at first, if need be, take it a little easier in between or stop altogether until you feel you are more in control of yourself.

Distracting yourself a little bit can make your arousal go down. Think of things that are not sex related. Of course don’t take it so far that you get completely turned off either! But the point is, if you focus too much on the orgasm you’re about to experience, it will come and go too quickly.

BREATHE! Take relaxing deep breaths, it will help you keep the pace you’re in.

Variation is very important: if repetitive stimulation is what does the job for you, try changing positions a few times in each sex session. The different angles and levels of tightness you experience will not only help you last, it will also arouse your partner more and could make them orgasm sooner than they otherwise might have! Even in the same position you can vary the depth and pace.

If you do ejaculate very quickly, don’t let it spoil the fun! Your hands, tongue, lips can pleasure your partner as well. Explore different ways of satisfying your lover - show that you care about them having as much pleasure as you just had. It’s not the end of the world, so make an effort to be involved and active until you both are happy.

The second time always takes longer! If you are able to regain strength and get an erection again after ejaculating, perfect. Otherwise, masturbating earlier in the day when you know you might get lucky later on can be a good way to prepare.

Countermeasures - Alone

Much has been written about controlling the male orgasm. Practising in order to last longer always involve lots of self stimulation. You explore your limits yourself, and try building up some mental control over when and how you want to cum.

By Hand: masturbate as usual but when you feel you are about to have an orgasm, slow down or stop. Keep doing this a few times every time you masturbate. Try building it up so you can last longer and longer each time you masturbate.

A little help: there are many products on the market which are specifically designed to increase Stamina; you could get some special condoms: Durex Performa for instance. These condoms are lined with a cream that numbs your cock a little bit so the stimulation feels less intense.A similar effect can be achieved by using Magic Stamina Spray.

Using a masturbation toy which replicates the sensation you get from penetration could help. After all, it is quite different form using your hands; and probably you are quite used to your hands already… Why not try a FleshLight; Pink Vagina or Clear Vagina or perhaps a Pink Butt or Ice Butt Fleshlight.

But most importantly; if you have this problem - there are many others out there experiencing the same! And with time and practice, you can find a solution that fits you and your partner…

What a wonderful invention they are; condoms. Where would we be without them. Diseased and with 20 children each, having to think twice about sex, considering the implications; is it really worth it?

So all worries can be solved with the simplicity of ripping open a little foil packet, and rolling a balloon type of thing down your man’s penis, and off you go doing the wild thing. Or so people want you to believe…

I may be horribly arrogant, ungrateful for such a very useful invention. But I hate condoms! So shoot me!

You’re right in the middle of wild and steamy foreplay, clothes peel off, love marks start showing up on various body parts. And then for the grand finale you unwrap a condom, put it on and watch your lover go limp. Or if not that, you put it on, start off like bunny rabbits, and get sore on the inside, with the condom making wrinkles, scouring along the inside of your pussy until you really just don’t want to do it anymore in the first place. Yes a very effective contraceptive indeed.

Of course, if you want multiple partners, you have to protect yourself from STDs and all that. However, in a monogamous relationship, there should be something better; something that doesn’t turn you off so completely? Let me know if you find something.. I’m just off to the chemist, picking up my prescription contraceptive pills. Which will undoubtedly make me fat, spotty, moody and asexual. Once again, a very effective contraceptive; Not only do you not feel like having any sex, neither would you be very attractive to your partner. I guess humans really are meant to have sex in order to have kids only. Our bodies just won’t have it any other way!